Chairs of doom

[fbhjr]

The office where I was has always been considered temporary. When we moved
here 2 years ago, the new building was going to be ready in 6 months.
Because of that, they bought all used furniture for the office. And, since
it has never been more than 6 months until we move, they are reluctant to
repair or replace things.

The result has been that the conference room has become a repository of bad
chairs.

None of the chairs in there match. Only 2 would be what I consider
acceptable.
And, the bad ones now have reputations.

There is the ejector seat: if you don’t lean back all the time, it springs
to a full forward tilt. If you’re not ready for this, it can dump you on
the ground or face first into the conference table.

Lefty: It only has an arm rest on the left side. The right side is a
fairly sharp piece of metal where the right arm rest used to be. Lean on
it and you will be a lefty.

Shorty: The chair is stuck at its very lowest height. If I sit there, my
knees are up to my chest.

Wheel lock: the wheels only roll forwards and back. You cannot rotate
them, or slide them. For reorientation, you must pick it up off of the
ground.

Slippery: a polished leather chair. If you don’t hang onto the arm rests
there is a good chance you will slide right out of it.

It has now become common practice to try and maneuver other people into
these seats of doom.
Of course it is best if you can get the person giving the presentation into
either the ejector seat or slippery so that when they raise their laser
pointer, things happen.

It is amazing how few people realize that coming early to meetings means
you get one of the 2 good chairs…

Comments

[ravena-kade.livejournal.com]

We had chairs like that once the insurance company started laying off folks every month. By the end I think all of the chairs were misfits

[marketeer]

We have chairs like that in our huddle rooms. It keeps the meetings short.

[evrgreen.livejournal.com]

Scott Adams just HAS to make a strip about this topic!! Maybe you should try sending this story to him? I'd love to see Wally get the Ejector Seat treatment..