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The owners of my company try and get some cash for almost everything they can. This is, of course, why they own the buisiness I just work for. But, it can manifest in strange ways.

One of them had the company handyman clean out their attic a couple of years ago. While doing so, he found this:

The handyman brought it to me and said:
“I found this in his attic. I asked him what to do with it. He said ‘Have Frank check with the people he knows that that museum to see if it is worth anything.’”
“Well, those swords aren’t worth the metal they are made of,” I said. “The fur attached to the wood backer probably ruined its value. Don’t know what to say about the small bit of armor with the shamrock and truck stickers.”
“He said to have you ask the museum,” the handyman said, quite firmly. “See if you can get any money for it.”
“OK, I will,” I said, realizing how little ‘request’ was in the instruction.

So, the next time I was down at the museum I asked the currator to come take a look at it.
Once he was done laughing, I asked him:
“So, is it worth anything?”
More laughter.
“Well, it doesn’t have any cash value,” he said. “But, with the fur, shamrock and truck I’d say it is a priceless example of Americana.”
“Would the museum be interested in investing it it?” I asked.
More laughter.
“Hell no,” he finally said.

So, I brought it back to work.
“It’s not worth anything,” I said. “Unless you count as something to make people with PhD’s double over with laughter.”
“OK,” he said. “I’ll tell the Chairman it isn’t worth anything.”
“What should I do with it?” I asked.
“I was told to get rid of things that weren’t worth anything,” he said. “Do whatever you want with it.”

So, it now hangs on our practice area wall.
If we’re ever invaded by PhD’s I can point to that and they’ll be helpless...