Holly and I did talk some today about the bad things between us.
Some of the things she says I’ve said are quite bad, and well beyond the pale. I don’t doubt I’ve said them. The examples she used were all from about a year ago, and didn’t make it into my long term memory. So, as she remembers the things I said, she has every right to be upset about them.
Even she admits that I might have intended them as jokes. Although if so, they weren’t good ones.
It does give me things to ponder. I need to think of how I have communicated, how it could be misunderstood, and how to avoid things that could only be taken good in one specific way, but have hundreds of bad options.
But, at least we are talking. At least I am understanding more of the specifics of what upset her.
There is a huge distance to go. But, even small steps help us get there.
Some of the things she says I’ve said are quite bad, and well beyond the pale. I don’t doubt I’ve said them. The examples she used were all from about a year ago, and didn’t make it into my long term memory. So, as she remembers the things I said, she has every right to be upset about them.
Even she admits that I might have intended them as jokes. Although if so, they weren’t good ones.
It does give me things to ponder. I need to think of how I have communicated, how it could be misunderstood, and how to avoid things that could only be taken good in one specific way, but have hundreds of bad options.
But, at least we are talking. At least I am understanding more of the specifics of what upset her.
There is a huge distance to go. But, even small steps help us get there.