Points of view
Sep. 17th, 2007 08:30 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
fbhjrSo, is it just me?
I will admit the fact my wife fooled around with another man bothers me. It does.
But, what bother’s me most is that the man in question is married to someone else.
Is that just me? Am I somehow old fashion and out of date for that to bother me?
Honestly that bothers me more than her cheating on me. Before we were married we both fooled around with other people. In the grand scheme of things, what’s one more blow job she’s given? I can make that decision to let it go. I know what’s gone on. I can say “they used protection so I’m probably OK, it isn’t something I can’t forgive.”
But, this other’s guy’s wife can’t make that choice. She doesn’t know where my wife has been, what or who she’s done things with, what she might have been exposed to. And, she can’t make an informed decision about if she is OK with it or not.
That bothers me. A lot.
(I do remain worried about where this other guy’s been and what he may have. But, I’m told protection was used, so it isn’t as bad as it could be. Condoms don’t stop everything, but they stop a lot.)
So, I wonder this because I don’t see signs of people saying things like “leave Frank if you have to, but don’t steal someone else’s husband.”
Maybe bunches of you are saying it to her, and she just isn’t passing it on to me. But, when I say it to her I don’t get a “yeah xxx said that too” answer. I get a “stop pushing me” answer.
So, I wonder if it is just me.
I want her back. I do.
I want her to want to be back.
But, even if things don’t work out and we don’t get back together, I still thinks she shouldn’t be with someone else’s husband.
Maybe it just me.
I will admit the fact my wife fooled around with another man bothers me. It does.
But, what bother’s me most is that the man in question is married to someone else.
Is that just me? Am I somehow old fashion and out of date for that to bother me?
Honestly that bothers me more than her cheating on me. Before we were married we both fooled around with other people. In the grand scheme of things, what’s one more blow job she’s given? I can make that decision to let it go. I know what’s gone on. I can say “they used protection so I’m probably OK, it isn’t something I can’t forgive.”
But, this other’s guy’s wife can’t make that choice. She doesn’t know where my wife has been, what or who she’s done things with, what she might have been exposed to. And, she can’t make an informed decision about if she is OK with it or not.
That bothers me. A lot.
(I do remain worried about where this other guy’s been and what he may have. But, I’m told protection was used, so it isn’t as bad as it could be. Condoms don’t stop everything, but they stop a lot.)
So, I wonder this because I don’t see signs of people saying things like “leave Frank if you have to, but don’t steal someone else’s husband.”
Maybe bunches of you are saying it to her, and she just isn’t passing it on to me. But, when I say it to her I don’t get a “yeah xxx said that too” answer. I get a “stop pushing me” answer.
So, I wonder if it is just me.
I want her back. I do.
I want her to want to be back.
But, even if things don’t work out and we don’t get back together, I still thinks she shouldn’t be with someone else’s husband.
Maybe it just me.
